There is neither a structure nor a texture to this blog. The subject matter can be anything and everything under the sky that I feel about at any given point that I happen to sit and blog rambling about everything in general. My thoughts and views are basically influenced by what I read, hear, gather, and ponder... if there is any copyright violation which I have not duly acknowledged, kindly let me know.
My world comprises of LO the little one, OA the other adult at home, kiddo the brother :)
Jun 8, 2008
It has been a month exactly since the demise of my beloved taatee and I have survived this tragedy fairly well and bounced up real fast, maybe because I was not there to see him or maybe because of part of me has come to accept that it is how life is, old water has to give way to new ones and that the cycle of life goes on. Nothing seems to shatter me any longer, I guess something inside me kind of died. The two individuals who mattered the most to me just left me leaving their size hole in my heart and now it feels nothing can affect me as badly as this one.
In one way, I feel relieved now. I dont have to worry day after day after day as to whether he is eating well, as to whether someone is there to talk to him, see if he is okay, as to whether he is really as happy as he tries to sound to convince me that he is fine. It feels good to know that he no longer has to struggle every second of his life, battling the odds alone. My selfish, comfort-seeking mind finds solace in the blind belief that he is safe around in the heavens with amma by his side and both of them knowing the value of each other with this separation are happy for ever and ever finding each other yet again.
Miss you both but be glad to know that I have learned to cope with losses much better, the way you wanted me to be, strong and brave.