There is neither a structure nor a texture to this blog. The subject matter can be anything and everything under the sky that I feel about at any given point that I happen to sit and blog rambling about everything in general. My thoughts and views are basically influenced by what I read, hear, gather, and ponder... if there is any copyright violation which I have not duly acknowledged, kindly let me know.

My world comprises of LO the little one, OA the other adult at home, kiddo the brother :)

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Aug 16, 2009

Dear Daughter - 4

Dear LO:

This is the first time the letter has arrived way too late from your monthly birthday. Sorry my LO, I had been really really busy doing nothing in specific but down with fever first, then your outdoor activities have increased a lot and I have to plan them a lot which eats up all the time..

I just cant stop wondering each and every month as to how time flies and how I still feel like carrying you and you seem to be growing leaps and bounds each day (touchwood).. You are no longer the tiny tiny delicate petal that has come out of amma's womb, you are now gradually blooming into a bud that gives amma eternal joy and peace, a calm soothing balm to her soul that no one can ever provide.

This month comes in with you recognizing me and everyone in general and responding to each person individually in your own signature style. More sounds from you and more sounds that you recognize as well. You have a new game every other day and play it no end, like blowing bubbles is your latest.. you bring out all the saliva from God knows where and then make those bubbles in the mouth and blow. You put out so much of water in that game that I am seriously getting worried about you get dehydrated.. sigh!!!

We are through with your vaccines for now and the only needle piercing you would be in your 9th month. It came as a surprise to me as well as the doctor when you cried a bit and then silently kept sobbing like an elder person would do minutes after the vaccine. I loved you soo much when you did that (now comeon dont jump to conclusion that amma loves it when you cry or dont even dare to use it as a tool on her ever ;) ).

We have had so many milestones this month like you recognizing people, responding to them, cooing, trying to roll over, etc. You are still the wonderful angel and give me that space I crave for but you need me all the time.. if not near you, in your vicinity at least, popping in once in a while to look at you or play our silly games cuddling and kissing and licking with jungle wild cries from both of us. I am thankful time and again that we stay in such a big house with no neighbors to listen to the noise that comes from here ;).

I have recognized in you the need to be ensconced in the nest of affection from me and people in general, you love it when there are people around you, you squeal at them, you touch them gently on their faces, you kick them softly, or throw your arms indicating that you want to be lifted up or taken out.. I am grateful that you are a people's person and pray and wish and hope that you remain so. I so hate it when kids get clingy. I want you to trust people and go to them.. there is a lot of time to grow wary of people when you grow up but for now just dont lose that innocent bliss and spread your cheer and happiness to everyone near you.

The world out there can be really really bad but for now enjoy it all you can when you still can...

I love you LO, every single moment I lay my eyes on you, I fall head over heals in love with you. If anyone ever said that to me, I would have wondered if that was possible but now that I do, I know it is possible. You fill my otherwise empty and meaningless life with a lot of challenges and happiness and a strong purpose to look ahead. You throw me a challenge in the sense, you are so mouldable and vulnerable and it is my duty to guide you and groom you and get you ready for the world. It is up to me to make you an individual who strives to give out something for the world we are born in rather than anticipate what the world gives us.

Initially all my life I felt I could relax and have loads of joy when I have a kid. When I got married, all I could dream was of you and a happy family life. When I got pregnant, I was feeling that that is the most crucial phase, to get you out in to this world healthy. When I saw you in my hands, I felt how fragile you were and not the earlier one but now is the crucial phase to handle you at that time. When you are grown up enough where you are not so fragile there are so many things that make this phase seem even more crucial, so I guess this trend is going to be a never ending one as long as I live.

But, I promise you again LO that I will just be involved in your life as much as you need me and never ever interfere. If I ever tend to do that, just show me these letters, will you??

Love you more than my life..

As you complete 4 months and enter the 5th month...

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