There is neither a structure nor a texture to this blog. The subject matter can be anything and everything under the sky that I feel about at any given point that I happen to sit and blog rambling about everything in general. My thoughts and views are basically influenced by what I read, hear, gather, and ponder... if there is any copyright violation which I have not duly acknowledged, kindly let me know.

My world comprises of LO the little one, OA the other adult at home, kiddo the brother :)

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Mar 21, 2016

Officially the Addict...

No one has to really tell me the fact that I am an addict to the social media, TV and everything and anything that has no use per se but takes up whole or the most part of your life like nothing ever does.

There was a time when Farmville was the craze and I got into it, but what jolted me out of it was that i was waking up to harvest and feeling tired to wake up and feed the kid, the kid had been the top priority then and I got rid of it just like that.. but now things are different the child goes to school most of the day, then she has the activities which do not need much supervision or presence there I go off to the alluring world which does not need much thinking, watching TV, movies, browsing gathering the most useless information and feel dog tired without actually doing anything...

Also, there is another virtual group where I get carried away and no matter how much I try I cannot disentangle and putting that on paper here means that I have accepted defeat which I would not like otherwise, me being me, so the thing is here it goes and let me see if I get regular here and leave it out there.  The world of superficial feelings where I am trying to explain myself, how I feel about what I do or what I think they should do rather than living the moment.

There is so much more going on with life, the decision of to be or not to be in US, a lot of thinking and rethinking and the urge to go back getting stronger and stronger.  I hate being stranded in a country which technically terms me as an "alien" in their land and having no legal permission to work is something that adds to teh woes.  What can one who does not drive do to keep oneself sane without getting into the routine desi squabbles with the ladies in the groups that you tend to become a part of unknowingly, struggling to fit in where you dont belong, trying desperately to stay there for the sake of your child rather than anything else, being fed up with the only people you interact being the kid, kids friends, parents of kids friends or the colleagues of OA and their wives.

It is tiring, taxing and most importantly killing some part of me within.... so there it goes, my turmoil, out for all to see, nothing big but nothing small either... I am trying to figure out a way and the adjustment is taking its toll on a lot of things including the kid, need to shake it off...

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